In the days after Oct. 7, in which Hamas militants killed around 1,200 people, Yarden Garzon struggled to eat and sleep. The outbreak of war in Israel and the Gaza Strip was all-consuming to her, as she watched the news from Bloomington, Ind., where she’s a sophomore guard. Yarden, who was born and raised in Israel, worried about her friends, her family, her country. “I think I was more nervous than my mom,” Garzon said. “It was really scary the first week.”

Garzon’s parents have been half a world away from her, staying put in their home in Ra’anana, Israel, an affluent suburb north of Tel Aviv about 50 miles from the war’s epicenter. Still, over the last two months as the death toll has risen, her family has spent time in the house’s bomb shelter. Sirens warning of air strikes pierced the sky.

Of Garzon’s three siblings, only her older sister, Lior Garzon, is also in the United States. She is a senior at Oklahoma State and a preseason honorable mention all-conference forward for the Cowgirls. “This is one of my most important seasons,” Lior said. “I didn’t know what to do. To stay. To go home, be with my family. It was really a question of what to do.”

She stayed. But it has been 82 days since the world shifted for the Garzons. Since then, they have played key roles for their respective schools. Both have started every game and are averaging double-digit points. They’re also dealing with grief.

Growing up, they knew what to do when sirens blared. The sound didn’t ring every day or week — Yarden describes her childhood as peaceful — but Lior says they were always ready for whatever might occur. Her father, Eitan Garzon, recalls a game in which his daughters were playing when sirens went off. Everyone scurried to shelters, but play eventually resumed as normal.

Both Garzons have long gravitated to basketball, even when presented alternatives. As a child, Lior danced and swam, Eitan said. She also tried judo and tennis. Yarden was a talented painter and played volleyball. Nevertheless, the region’s outdoor courts appealed most. “After all, in all the routes that I send them in, they go back to the basketball,” said Eitan, who also played while growing up. Their success has become a point of pride — both Lior and Yarden represented Israel at last summer’s European Championships, which were held partially in Tel Aviv — and a launchpad to travel the world.

When Yarden walks into Simon Skjodt Assembly Hall or Cook Hall, Indiana’s practice facility, she tries to focus on the sport. The gym, she said, is “like that safe place.”

“I just clear my mind when I focus on basketball,” she added.

But if she has her phone in hand, it becomes difficult to ignore news from the region. Lior has tried convincing her sister, who already had a daily habit of watching the news, to take regular breaks and not necessarily track every minute update. Lior concedes that early on she felt anxious during practices, wondering, “What if something is happening right now?”

Untangling the situations in their two worlds has been next to impossible. Lior drew a Star of David on both of her Nike sneakers. On the left shoe, in Hebrew she wrote, “You can never kill our spirit.” In the handshake line after Oklahoma State’s loss to Colorado in early November, Buffaloes coaches told her they were thinking of her and her family.

She teared up when at an Oklahoma State football game earlier this season, a moment of silence was held for the thousands who had died amid the fighting. Her teammates made her a gift basket, full of milk chocolate Hershey Kisses and a Starbucks gift card. “To realize other people care and know what you’re going through, to have this moment, I think that was really special,” Lior said.

At Indiana, a section of fans who attended their early December game against Stetson wore blue shirts that read “We Stand With Yarden” on the front and with the Star of David inside a basketball. Assistant coach Rhet Wierzba, who hosted Yarden for a Shabbat dinner shortly after the war broke out, has worn a lapel pin of the Israeli flag on his jacket to support the sophomore. Hoosiers players also posed for a picture holding the flag just days after the initial attack. “The small things we can do that she knows how much she is loved,” Wierzba said.

Before Indiana’s season-opener on Nov. 9, Yarden took a black Sharpie and wrote “Bring Them Home” on tape wrapping her left wrist, with the name Noam Avigdori, a 12-year-old girl who at the time was being held hostage, written underneath. Avigdori is back in Israel, after being held for 50 days, but Yarden has continued raising awareness for those who have been taken.

The gestures, Eitan said, are done without any prompting. “It comes from them, not us,” he said in a phone interview. Still, their parents send photos and videos of the acts to their Israeli friends. They are small displays of support. “The little things is the big things,” Eitan said. Even brief moments of joy are still moments of joy.

Eitan says he and his wife often talk with their daughters more than once a day. They try to stay calm and reassure them of their own safety. But both “take it very hard,” Eitan said. “It’s different to talk about because we just need to touch or to hug them.” Lior said having Yarden in America helps, however. “We feel like (we’re) in the same boat,” she said. The sisters text daily, about happenings at school, about their respective programs and about the war. Community has been key.

It took Lior a while to focus on basketball. Even the sport she’s played since childhood couldn’t distract her. “Like why would I enjoy it when people literally (are) fighting for their life right now?” she asked.

However, more than a third of the way through the season, she’s found herself enjoying the season. She’s drawn strength from feeling added purpose. “I think my mind right now is (thinking) this is the best way I can represent Israel, just showing how strong we are and nobody can actually kill our spirit,” she said.

The words are written on her sneaker. With every step, she moves forward.

(Illustration: Sean Reilly / The Athletic; Photos of Yarden and Lior Garzon: Jeffrey Brown / Icon Sportswire via Getty Images,  Michael Hickey / Getty Images, Courtesy of OSU Athletics)

Every year at this time, we marvel at the many creative ways baseball players find to make an appearance on the ever-popular Strange But True Injuries of the Year leaderboard.

So we’d like to thank this year’s baseball population for … cooking breakfast … playing the piano … and doing their best to get in and out of their hotel bathroom safely. But you know what’s especially amazing? None of those mishaps even topped this list!

Really? Yes, really. So here they come, the Strangest But Truest Injuries of 2023.

First prize: Eye confess!

We always award Injury of the Year bonus points to guys who manage to get hurt while they’re already hurt. So here’s to Rays relief warrior Pete Fairbanks, who couldn’t even cover up the Giannis imitation that got him into this mess.

When Fairbanks met with the Rays’ media delegation in June after returning from a stint on the injured list with hip inflammation, he brought a dazzling black eye with him — and one of the great How I Did This stories of the 21st century.

Turns out this could happen to you, too, if you try dunking on your 3-year-old in the pool.

“I pulled the pool basketball hoop down onto my face after dunking on a 3-year-old,” Fairbanks confessed, “to kind of teach him an early lesson in life that, when you’re in the paint, you cannot be caught unawares underneath the rim.”

To which we can only hope his son said: Send it in, Jerome!

Second prize: It’s all the alarm clock’s fault!

We’ve always thought of Blue Jays starter Yusei Kikuchi as a sleeping giant.

Little did we know!

Why did he make an early exit from a great September start at Yankee Stadium? Because he cramped up, he said, after getting “only” 11 hours’ sleep — as opposed to his usual 12 to 14 hours. So he may not lead the league in shutouts. But what the heck. You have to love his chances of leading the league in shuteye. And if this is a sleep goal of yours, T-shirts are available!

Third prize: When you (and your back) have gotta go

When Diamondbacks third baseman Evan Longoria strained his back last July, he was supposed to miss only a week or so. So why did it turn into three weeks? Because, by his account, he aggravated his back getting up off the toilet in a hotel bathroom in San Francisco.

So you thought making outs could be hazardous to a baseball player’s career, huh? Watch out for the outhouse!

Fourth prize: There goes his walk ratio

Need more proof that most spring training drills are overrated? Dodgers pitcher Tony Gonsolin headed off to a routine fielding drill during spring training last March — and got through the fielding part fine. Turns out it was his exit strategy that he should have been working on.

He tripped walking off the field, sprained his ankle and missed the first four weeks of the season. But was it all worth it? He didn’t make an error all season!

Fifth prize: They had plenty of time to be an even greater dad

Finally, there were so many great moments in fatherhood this season … that led to not-so-great moments in trying to make it onto the field … so we’re rounding them up here. If their families print this and frame it, it should make for a lovely Father’s Day gift.

• Giants pitcher Anthony DeSclafani fractured his toe … playing the piano with his son!

• Adam Wainwright burned his finger … cooking breakfast for his son!

• Josh Donaldson sliced his thumb … while assembling a toy for his daughter!

All that seems troublesome. But hey, at least they didn’t try dunking on their kids in the pool.

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The Year in Strange But True

(Top photo of Pete Fairbanks: Patrick Smith / Getty Images)

Peter Storrie can remember visiting the London studio of Herzog & de Meuron, the renowned Swiss architects, and being shown a striking vision of Portsmouth’s future.

“It was something else,” he tells The Athletic. “They put it up on the screen for us and it certainly had the wow factor.”

This was 2007 and the ambitious plans were for a new 36,000-capacity stadium on the city’s docks. Storrie, then chief executive, had accepted that Portsmouth would need to leave Fratton Park, the club’s home since 1899, and a proposed relocation could hardly have been more impressive.

Located in between the Spinnaker Tower and the historic naval base, a £600million waterfront project that would include apartments and restaurants promised a transformational impact.

“This will be the most spectacular stadium, set against the backdrop of the harbour and the English Channel befitting the club’s history,“ said Storrie back in 2007, when Portsmouth were a top-half Premier League club.

They would win the FA Cup a year later when beating Cardiff City, too, but by that time plans for a new stadium had been all but scrapped. Opposition had come from local councillors and the British Royal Navy, who had “operational and security concerns” after choosing to base two super aircraft carriers nearby.

Portsmouth pivoted from the dockyards to another waterfront site nearby at Horsea Island, again designed by Herzog & de Meuron with little expense spared. Again it collapsed, this time against the backdrop of the global financial crisis of 2008. As such, Fratton Park, boisterous but limited, remains the club’s home.

“The stadium on the docks was a fantastic design, really stunning,” Storrie says. “It would’ve been perfect. It was there on the waterfront. It would’ve been an iconic venue. One of the great stadiums if it had been built.

“Would it ever have got through planning? Probably not — but who knows? It was one of the great designs that never happened.”

And it is a crowded field. For every impressive stadium built by English clubs in the last 30 years, there has been another that failed to get beyond the architects’ drawings or the fantasies of an owner.

Like Chelsea’s vision for Battersea Power Station and the Gothic re-imagining of Stamford Bridge. Or Liverpool’s proposed move to a futuristic new home in Stanley Park. Everton lived out three different projects at Kings Dock, Kirkby and Walton Hall Park before finally planting a spade in the ground at Bramley-Moore Dock, site of their long-awaited new home from the 2025-26 season.

Tottenham Hotspur had their own plans to knock down and rebuild the Olympic Stadium before West Ham United became tenants in 2016, while once upon a time Birmingham City had plans for a 55,000-seater stadium that would form part of the Birmingham Sports Village. Karren Brady, Birmingham’s managing director back in 2006, called it “a once-in-a-lifetime regeneration project.” Or, as it turned out, not-in-this-lifetime.

That is typical of the well-versed big sell, especially when supporters are being asked to leave a historic home. Project what the future might look like in all its animated glory and hope it marks the first step on the journey.

Actions do not always accompany the words. Whether through funding problems or supporter opposition, sometimes both, English football has a long list of projects that have gone to the great drawing board in the sky.

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Leeds United were riding the crest of a wave back in the spring of 2001. A run to the Champions League semi-finals, where they were beaten 3-0 by Valencia, had emboldened the belief that Leeds could establish themselves among English football’s elite and part of the grand plan was a move away from Elland Road.

A wasteland site was picked near junction 45 of the A1(M) at Skelton and a new £40million, 50,000-capacity ground was proposed. Elland Road, meanwhile, would be sold to the local council for an estimated £20million to help fund it.

Peter Ridsdale, Leeds’ chairman, had a blunt message as they attempted to keep pace with those at the top of the Premier League. “Doing nothing is not an option,” he warned in a letter to fans.

All supporters were asked if they would back a renovation of Elland Road or a move to a new stadium during a consultation process. “On the one hand there is the history and the memories that we all share, and on the other hand is the need to ensure that we offer future generations a world-class team and a world-class stadium,” said Ridsdale.

Three months later it was announced that 87.6 per cent of the votes cast had been in favour of leaving Elland Road. “An overwhelming endorsement,” concluded Ridsdale, who outlined plans to find sponsorship for the club’s new home.

The push to move was not as universally popular as Ridsdale had claimed after less than half of ballot papers were returned but those in opposition, the traditionalists keen to stay at Elland Road, need not have worried.

Leeds’ outlay of £77million on players inside the previous three lavish years caught up with them and within three years of Ridsdale championing a move, it was a Championship club once more. Skelton was quietly brushed under the carpet and two decades later, with no meaningful restoration work completed, Elland Road and its limitations remain a headache for others to inherit.

Funding — or a lack of it — typically becomes the insurmountable obstacle in these grand stadium designs.

Constructing a new home from scratch or rebuilding an existing ground is the biggest possible expenditure any club can face and, as such, is reliant on huge borrowings. The biggest and best are now £1billion projects.

Liverpool did not have to find that much back in 2007 but even the touted £400million needed to build a 60,000-seater stadium in Stanley Park proved beyond former owners Tom Hicks and George Gillett.

Leaving Anfield behind had been a key thread to the promises of the U.S. businessmen, with Gillett pledging at his opening press conference that “the shovel needs to be in the ground in the next 60 days.”

The previous five years, before the arrival of Hicks and Gillett, had seen a range of plans put forward, with outline planning permission approved for a Stanley Park stadium as far back as 2003.

Original plans were redesigned by Hicks and Gillett and revised again after a target to begin work in the summer of 2007 was missed, before any tangible hope of a new stadium began to recede in 2008.

Like Portsmouth, the credit crunch and owners with limited resources brought the project to a standstill.

“Our commitment to building a new world-class Liverpool Football Club stadium is undiminished,” said Liverpool in a statement. “Like many other major development projects in the UK and overseas we are affected by global market conditions. We will use this period productively and revisit the plans for the stadium to increase its capacity to 73,000 seats.”

The vision failed to materialise, though. Year after year there was no meaningful progress until Hicks and Gillett were replaced by Fenway Sports Group, who confirmed their intention to instead redevelop Anfield in 2012.

“It could have been brilliant but we have probably set ourselves back several years,” former chief executive Ian Ayre said in 2011. Liverpool will finally get the 60,000-capacity stadium they have spent 20 years waiting for when the new Anfield Road Stand is fully opened by the end of January.

Those years of uncertainty at the start of this century would regularly see a contentious plan proposed. With Everton accepting the need to leave Goodison Park for two decades or more, a ground share between the two Merseyside clubs was touted on more than one occasion.

As much as £30million was promised from public funds in 2003 for a new super-stadium in the city. The North West Development Agency proposed that Liverpool and Everton should share in a bid to regenerate the wider Anfield area and six years later, as England gathered together its push to host the 2018 World Cup. Meetings were even held with the then sports minister Richard Caborn.

The plans, though, were consistently met with opposition from the two rivals, both in the boardroom and among fan groups. Everton described it as “utter nonsense” the clubs should groundshare in 2009.

That was because they had other ideas. Big ones. Unperturbed by the failed attempt to build a new 50,000-seater stadium on the King’s Dock, now site of the Liverpool Echo Arena, by 2007 they were pushing ahead with a move to a site in Kirkby, eight miles out of the city centre on Liverpool’s northern edge.

It would form part of an enormous retail park headed up by Tesco and the capacity increases were forecast to generate £6million more per season. Selling the naming rights for the stadium would earn the same amount again.

Not that it ever went to plan. An opposition group, the Keep Everton In Our City Campaign, was formed, while Liverpool City Council, who felt Everton should not leave their boundaries, were strongly against the move. Leader Warren Bradley called the proposed stadium in Kirkby “a cow shed in a small town”. They got their wish by 2009, a period of economic stress that hurt the construction industry, when the UK government blocked the proposed £400million joint development.

Good things are coming to those who have waited, though. After all the false dawns and stadium designs that never were across 20 years, Everton will relocate to Bramley Moore-Dock in 18 months, a wonderful new stadium that will be one of 10 hosts for Euro 2028.

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If Everton will soon join Liverpool in having the bigger home they always wanted, others are not so fortunate. Chelsea supporters continue to wait on proposals that would see Stamford Bridge redeveloped or a long association with their home ground ended by a move. The capacity of 40,000 ceased to be sufficient long ago.

History tells us that. Chelsea’s previous owner, Roman Abramovich, was eager to increase matchday revenues as far back as 2012 when the club submitted a formal offer to buy Battersea Power Station on the south bank of the Thames. The site alone was valued at £500million and given the Grade II listed status of the former electricity station, plans were unveiled that would see its four iconic chimneys incorporated into a design.

Designs were made public after Chelsea had been outbid by Malaysian property developers SP Setia and Sime Darby Property, regarded at the time as a means of applying diplomatic pressure.

“We firmly believe our proposals could address the unique challenges presented by the site,” said Chelsea in a statement. “The design would integrate the stadium with the power station in a sensitive, unique and powerful way, with all significant historical aspects of the Power Station to be retained.”

Not that it made much difference. The impressive restored site is now home to apartments, shops, bars and restaurants.

Chelsea did not stand still and, three years after their failed attempt to buy Battersea Power Station, had revealed stunning designs for a new Stamford Bridge. Like Portsmouth’s docklands plans, Herzog & de Meuron were behind the drawings that would see Chelsea rehoused in a 60,000-capacity stadium by 2020. The striking images were said to be “inspired by the design of Westminster Abbey” and quoted, at the time, as costing anywhere between £500million and £1billion. Cathedrals, as it was likened to, did not come cheap in a heavily populated area of the capital.

There were objections but broad support for the project. Inside a year, though, Abramovich had called a halt to it all. The crux of the problem? A visa.

Abramovich, back in the summer of 2018, encountered delays over a UK visa after seeing his previous one expire and a statement released by Chelsea said it was the “current unfavourable investment climate” that had been the trigger to postponing a Stamford Bridge redevelopment that would never be revived. The rest is an inglorious history for Abramovich, who was forced to sell Chelsea in 2021 when sanctioned by the UK government following Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.

The dream of a new home has not died for Chelsea as new owner Todd Boehly prepares to share new plans in 2024 but there will be regrets that a stadium build did not come sooner. Chelsea must make do with a stadium that houses 20,000 fewer supporters than the homes of London rivals, Tottenham, Arsenal and West Ham. Matchday revenues have flatlined at Stamford Bridge and, as of last season, meant Tottenham had a £37million annual advantage through the turnstiles.

Another club with sudden regrets are Newcastle United, who are going through their own consultation process on where to go next. St James’ Park, capped at 52,000, has been sold out every week since the takeover led by Saudi Arabia’s Public Investment Fund was completed in 2021.

Oh for something bigger, like the plans hatched in 1997. A planning application for a £90 million, 55,000-seater stadium on Castle Leazes, half a mile from St James’ Park, was submitted. They included a retractable roof and the option for capacity to be increased to 70,000.

“St James’ Park simply wasn’t big enough to cope with demand and the site itself had severe limitations,” says Sir John Hall, the former owner of Newcastle. “We needed a world-class stadium to offer us the best chance of sustained success.”

The plans, put on public display, were dubbed the “San Siro of the North” in a nod to the shared home of AC Milan and Inter Milan, and included a plan to convert St James’ Park into an indoor arena.

Fans backed the idea but others did not. A petition included 36,000 names opposed building on the Town Moor and a public inquiry causing lengthy delays became unavoidable once English Heritage took an interest in Newcastle’s plans. By November 1997, the focus had instead been turned to extending the capacity of St James’ Park from 36,000 to its 52,000, as it is today.

Fifteen or so miles to the south, rivals Sunderland had been through their collapsed bid by that point. They had proposed building a “Wembley of the North” close to the Nissan car manufacturing plant in 1992 and even incorporated twin towers in the designs included in a postal referendum. “That was intentional on my part; I wanted it to look like Wembley,” said former chairman Bob Murray.

The complex was due to cost £75million and include a 40,000-capacity stadium, 12,000-seater indoor arena and retail park. Such was their confidence, Sunderland even submitted a bid for it to be one of eight venues for Euro ’96. Then bang… EU funding they had lobbied for in Brussels had been pulled.

“Just before the Euro ’96 venues were announced, I received a phone call, out of the blue, to inform me that Nissan had suddenly turned hostile towards the new stadium,” wrote Murray in his autobiography I’d Do it All Again. “A call was made to 10 Downing Street and everything changed. Suddenly it was made abundantly clear it wasn’t going to happen.”

Sunderland instead went with the Stadium of Light as their next home after Roker Park, moving in 1997. Others have not been so fortunate.

Like Luton Town, who hope to be seeing out their final years at Kenilworth Road. It is almost 30 years since former owner David Kohler shared his wacky plans for a 20,000 indoor arena dubbed the Kohlerdome. Alas, he found neither the funding nor the site, which tends to be a problem.

There are countless others, too. Bristol Rovers have spent 20 years searching for a modern new home, as have Queens Park Rangers, who have hoped to build a new stadium at nearby Wormwood Scrubs. Blackpool (Whyndyke Farm), Carlisle United (Kingmoor Park), Southend United (Fossetts Farm) and Grimsby Town (Peaks Parkway) are among the countless other clubs who have devised ambitious plans yet still have not moved.

Just like Portsmouth. “It was very difficult to convert Fratton Park into a state-of-the-art stadium and that’s something the club needed to progress,” says Storrie, the former chief executive. “We had the fans pretty much onside but sadly it just didn’t happen.”

It was not the first stadium project to remain an architect’s vision and will not be the last.

Top image: Portsmouth’s plans for a new stadium on the waterfront were unveiled in 2007 (Herzog & de Meuron)

Scoring touchdowns during each offensive possession is the unspoken goal for every NFL team. For decades, celebrations have been the norm in accompanying touchdowns. It goes back all the way to the 1960s with Homer Jones and his touchdown spike.

Touchdown celebrations have become a choreographed production for some teams. Think back to the 1980s when Washington’s “Fun Bunch” made enemies after its group of players participated in a jumping high-five after a score. And think recently when the Seattle Seahawks did their best New Edition and *NSYNC impersonations, or when the Minnesota Vikings decided to play a game of Duck, Duck, Goose in the end zone.

The 2023 NFL season has had its share of memorable touchdown celebrations. Each team has had its moment. Some moments, however, have been bigger than others. The Athletic’s team of Jason Jones, Matt Barrows and Vic Tafur got together to reminisce over the season and discuss the best touchdown celebration for each team.

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AFC East

Buffalo Bills

“Stone Cold” Steve Austin would be proud of Stefon Diggs’ beer celebration during Week 4 as the Bills faced Miami.

After scoring against the Dolphins, Diggs ran to the fans, grabbed a couple of beers and smashed them together. It was an act similar to what the legendary pro wrestler did in the WWE.

Miami Dolphins

The Dolphins could be the subject of a celebration piece by themselves. Tyreek Hill, Jaylen Waddle, Raheem Mostert and the crew have provided several memorable celebrations.

During a Week 6 game against Carolina, Hill’s 41-yard touchdown reception, coupled with the use of a photographer’s phone, resulted in a backflip, as well as a unique selfie. It also ended up with the photographer being disciplined.

New England Patriots

The Patriots haven’t had a lot of opportunities to celebrate on offense this season. After one of their biggest touchdowns of 2023 — Mike Gesicki’s game-winning touchdown catch late to beat Buffalo in Week 7 — multiple players did the Griddy.

While some executed the dance, others still are unsure exactly what Mac Jones was doing. On top of that, former Patriot Rob Gronkowski, a fun-loving player in his day, criticized the team for being so happy about a regular-season win.

New York Jets

The end zone and the Jets haven’t been acquainted most of the season, but their most dramatic touchdown celebration might have come Week 1 against Buffalo.

Xavier Gipson used a 65-yard punt return to beat the Bills in overtime. He was mobbed by teammates and overcome with emotion for the win on the same night Aaron Rodgers left the game with an Achilles injury.

AFC West

Denver Broncos

This team does a lot of ball spinning and chest bumping. Two years ago, Jerry Jeudy was even fined for his bow-and-arrow celebration against Washington and thought about doing it again but had second thoughts in a game against Dallas.

Now, he just rides his horse around every time he scores.

Kansas City Chiefs

There hasn’t been a potato sack race like the one in 2017 or anything that cool this season. And no, we aren’t picking Taylor Swift’s touchdown dance with Patrick Mahomes’ wife, Brittany, from the Week 7 win over the Chargers.

Jerick McKinnon got a lift in after a touchdown during Week 14 against Buffalo. The bench-press celebration capped what was McKinnon’s first rushing touchdown of the season.

Las Vegas Raiders

It took the Christmas spirit — or, maybe, the Grinch spirit — to overtake the Raiders after a season of boring touchdown celebrations. Jack Jones picked off Patrick Mahomes on Christmas morning, and after staring down the Kansas City quarterback while running in for a touchdown, he offered the ball to a young Chiefs fan in the front row of the stands. When the excited fan reached for the ball, Jones pulled it back and merrily scampered off.

Los Angeles Chargers

There haven’t been a lot of reasons to choreograph for a Chargers team sitting at the bottom of the AFC West. Gerald Everett, however, did find a time to do his best Ray Lewis impersonation during Week 12 — against Baltimore, of all teams.

Austin Ekeler actually celebrated a first down with his team trailing Las Vegas by 42 points. But that doesn’t count.

AFC North

Baltimore Ravens

The Ravens do a lot because they’re actually throwing talented receivers the ball this season.

There was Odell Beckham Jr.’s Michael Jackson tribute, but top honors should go to Zay Flowers — who did two in one game. We didn’t hate the bouquet throw, but we definitely liked the penalty kick more.

Cincinnati Bengals

Joe Mixon proved that there are some Dillon Brooks fans out there.

Against Jacksonville in Week 13, Mixon scored on a 6-yard run to tie the game 7-7. That score — and Mixon’s dance, made popular by Brooks, the Houston Rockets small forward brought with him from his time with the Memphis Grizzlies — was important, as the Bengals needed overtime to beat the Jaguars 34-31.

Cleveland Browns

It’s always fun when the big fellas up front get to celebrate. It’s even better when a player comes home to celebrate.

Browns offensive tackle Dawand Jones sustained a season-ending knee injury early in December, but during an October road matchup against the Indianapolis Colts, Jones had the chance to deliver his own celebration after a Kareem Hunt touchdown run. Jones, who attended Ben Davis High School in Indianapolis, was handed the ball, and the 6-foot-8, 374-pound lineman gave the Lucas Oil Stadium crowd a show with a spike and a dance.

Pittsburgh Steelers

It’s been a tough year for the Steelers wide receivers. And yet, they’re the ones on the team going out of their way to celebrate touchdowns.

We have to give George Pickens some love for his Week 2 performance against the Browns. Pickens took a pass from Kenny Pickett and raced 71 yards for a touchdown. He then celebrated with the Acrisure Stadium crowd by taking a victory lap.

AFC South

Houston Texans

C.J. Stroud was more than three months from being born when the film “Baby Boy” was released. Clearly someone had him watch the movie as he acted out one of the best scenes when Jody (played by Tyrese Gibson) and his friend Sweet Pea (Omar Gooding) tried to find out who stole Jody’s bicycle.

Stroud lined up his teammates and pretended to punch George Fant, who fell out as part of the revenge scene reenactment.

Indianapolis Colts

Fans were denied seeing what Colts tight end Kylen Granson would have done to celebrate his first career touchdown during Week 2, as his 4-yard, second-quarter catch needed an official review before being ruled a score.

But because Gardner Minshew dancing or Zack Moss dunking aren’t exactly unique reactions, Granson gets the nod for thinking outside of the box. He took to Instagram to celebrate his first score, treating the football like a newborn child for a photo shoot.

Jacksonville Jaguars

Christian Kirk gets props for pretending to be an Amazon delivery man in Week 7. But during Week 4, the defense got to have fun with the celebration.

After cornerback Darious Williams’ pick six against Atlanta, the defense reenacted the movie “Toy Story.” The defenders were the toys who were active but fell to the ground once Andy (Williams) walked into the room. Wide receiver Zay Jones said the celebration was his idea.

Tennessee Titans

With all respect to the Titans’ touchdowns this year, the team’s best celebration of the season wasn’t even after a score.

It happened in a Week 4 game after the Titans defense forced a turnover against Cincinnati. The defense had a sack fumble and a recovery, then lined up for its version of a drumline — similar to a scene from the film “Drumline,” starring Nick Cannon.

NFC East

Dallas Cowboys

Let’s be clear: Salvation Army kettles are for coins and bills, not food items. But we’re fans of the Cowboys’ move to stash a few turkey legs in one of the oversized end zone kettles late in a Thanksgiving romp over the Washington Commanders.

After Dak Prescott hooked up with KaVontae Turpin on a 34-yard touchdown, Turpin hopped into one of the kettles to retrieve the prizes. Then he, Prescott and Jake Ferguson got a head start on their Thanksgiving meals.

New York Giants

No one is quite sure what you call it — maybe not even Tommy DeVito — but the Giants quarterback has MetLife Stadium, Northern New Jersey and the entire tri-state area doing his touchdown celebration.

DeVito started his old-school hand gesture — pinching his fingers together and shaking the wrist — in Week 11, and it’s caught fire since. “I kind of thought it was just the old Italians,” DeVito said. “When they talk, they start doing (the hand gesture). It’s just a little credit to them.” Could there be a more perfect gesture for the DeVito-led G-men?

Philadelphia Eagles

A.J. Brown and DeVonta Smith are taking their talents to South Philly. That was the message after Brown scored a 4-yard touchdown against the Cowboys in Week 9. The two receivers took on the roles of former Miami Heat teammates Dwyane Wade and LeBron James with Smith tossing the ball in the air for the bigger Brown to slam.

Note: No crossbars were harmed in the making of this celebration. Brown stopped short of doing a LeBron-like dunk over the bar, an act that was banned in 2014.

Washington Commanders

After running back Brian Robinson scored a 15-yard touchdown in Week 4 against Philadelphia, he hopped to his feet and flapped his arms in wobbly fashion, a dig at Philly’s “Fly Eagles Fly” chant.

Or maybe it was a comment on the Eagles’ rickety defense, which had eight missed tackles that day — including one on Robinson’s touchdown run.

NFC West

Arizona Cardinals

You’d expect a guy nicknamed “Hollywood” to be a bit of a showman. Marquise Brown didn’t disappoint after catching a 25-yard touchdown pass from Josh Dobbs against the Bengals in Week 5.

After the score, he leaped into the first row of seats and celebrated with fans.

Los Angeles Rams

It might not win an Oscar for Most Original Score, but there seemed to be something behind Puka Nacua’s and Cooper Kupp’s leaping chest bump following Nacua’s 70-yard touchdown against the Browns in Week 13.

It was very similar to the celebrations Kupp used to have with a former teammate — current Houston Texan receiver Robert Woods. Nacua happens to wear the same No. 17 Woods once had in L.A., and the celebration was tantamount to a proclamation that there’s a new receiver duo in town.

San Francisco 49ers

Christian McCaffrey was in the midst of what would become a 17-game scoring streak when he took a shovel pass into the end zone from 13 yards out in Week 6 against Cleveland, then spun the ball in the corner of the end zone. The 49ers tailback was on such a hot streak that George Kittle bent over at the waist and pretended to warm his hands over the spinning football.

Kittle also retrieved the ball, something he usually does after anyone scores, though he said at some point he stopped doing it for McCaffrey. “He scores way too much,” Kittle said.

Seattle Seahawks

Maybe there are better trash talkers in the NFL, but no one is a better trash signer than DK Metcalf.

The Seahawks wideout, who is learning American Sign Language, dissed longtime rival Ahkello Witherspoon by signing “44 is my son” following a Week 11 touchdown against the Rams. After a 31-yard score against the 49ers, he signed, “I’m a dog: w-o-o-f,” which are lyrics from a 2016 Migos song.

NFC North

Chicago Bears

The Bears have had their share of fun this season. Jaylon Johnson brought back Randy Moss’ controversial fake mooning against Moss’ old team, Minnesota, in Week 12. D’Onta Foreman and Khari Blasingame re-enacted a viral video from a slapboxing match during a win over the Raiders.

But their best celebration came from tight end Cole Kmet during Week 4 against Denver. He scored a touchdown, and then had a fan in the end zone pretend to throw him a pitch, which Kmet hit for a home run that another fan tried to catch at the wall behind the end zone.

Detroit Lions

Amon-Ra St. Brown nearly brought a “Key & Peele” skit to life Week 1 with his hip thrust celebration. Detroit’s safe-for-work celebration of the season, however, came against the Raiders during Week 8 on Monday night.

Running back Jahmyr Gibbs scored and took his leap into the stands to a new level. He actually got all the way into the stands and celebrated. He also had to be very careful climbing out the stands, as the wall was not a short climb like Green Bay’s Lambeau Field.

Green Bay Packers

The celebration that followed Malik Heath’s first-ever touchdown stands out because it was so spontaneous, so pure.

After Heath made a late-game catch at the pylon against the Giants in Week 14, he crashed into down judge Tom Stephan, taking him to the ground. That led to a couple of uncertain seconds while Stephan got to his feet. The Packers trailed 21-16 at the time, and everyone was waiting on whether it was ruled a touchdown — including Heath, an undrafted rookie whose helmet was knocked off after crashing into the official.

When Stephan finally signaled touchdown, Heath and the Packers went bonkers, and Heath ran the length of the end zone toward the Green Bay sideline.

Minnesota Vikings

The Vikings might take first prize for their keg stand celebration that followed Mekhi Blackmon’s fumble recovery late in a Week 14 game against the Raiders. His teammates hoisted Blackmon upside down into the air, and defensive lineman Harrison Phillips even pantomimed pumping the keg.

No, it technically wasn’t a touchdown celebration, but there were no touchdowns in that game. The score was 0-0 at the time, and Minnesota ultimately won 3-0, the lowest-scoring game since 2007.

NFC South

Atlanta Falcons

Jonnu Smith ran a long way, 60 yards, for a touchdown in Week 9 against Minnesota. When the tight end finally got to the end zone and tried to stop, he slipped on his back.

No worries, Smith played it off with his first-ever snow angel in Atlanta.

Carolina Panthers

The Panthers don’t score much, but when their No. 1 draft pick got his first touchdown, they … threw the ball in the stands?

In Carolina’s season opener against Atlanta, quarterback Bryce Young threw a 4-yard touchdown pass to tight end Hayden Hurst, who hurled the ball toward the Mercedes-Benz Stadium crowd after scoring. Important note: The Panthers later got the ball back for Young.

New Orleans Saints

Is the best Saints celebration of the year a Jimmy Graham pump fake?

We mentioned earlier the banning of the crossbar dunking celebration in 2014. Graham was the first person to get penalized for that back in August 2014, as the league fined him $30,000 for dunking twice in a preseason game against the Titans.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers

The Buccaneers don’t get points for originality, but if it’s not broke, don’t fix it.

The Buccaneers broke out their annual row-the-boat celebration last month against the Titans. Ironically, the first time they did it was in 2018 — against their current quarterback, Baker Mayfield, when they stopped him at the 1-yard line to beat the Browns.

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(Top photos of DK Metcalf, Stefon Diggs and Tyreek Hill: Michael Owens, Peter Nicholls and Megan Briggs / Getty Images)

It’s the most wonderful time of the year … except for one thing:

It’s no longer baseball season!

But that’s where we come in. It’s our not-so-solemn duty to get you through these long, chilly, baseball-free months by helping you relive the best of the Strange But True baseball season of 2023. Don’t tell us you already forgot that …

An unforgettable on-base streak ended even though the man who compiled that streak was standing on first base. … And we really did see a real human being steal third base and home on the same pitch. … And a team pitched a no-hitter despite the minor hindrance of also allowing seven runs — in the same inning!

We’re not making any of that up. We spend the whole year keeping track of wacky stuff like this so you don’t have to. So join us now as we relive The Strange But True Feats of 2023 … in five parts. Today’s installment: the hitters … the pitchers … and that Shohei guy who apparently does both of the above!

The Strangest But Truest Hitter of 2023: The Schwarbino

“Can you do me a favor?” Kyle Schwarber asked us one day in late September, though not totally seriously. “Can you write a story that tells people I actually had a good year?”

Sure. Why the heck not? It can be hard to know what to make of a leadoff hitter who finished the season hitting .197 with 215 strikeouts. So allow the Strange But True Feats of the Year column to help with that. It beats calculating those December wind-chill factors.

He’s the most unique leadoff monster of all time! Does it seem kinda Strange But True to see a team look at a .197 hitter who leads the league in strikeouts and decide: “Here’s a good way to win the World Series. Let’s have that guy lead off?”

Well, that’s what the Phillies did with the Schwarbino. On one hand, it allowed him to become the first man in the modern era to roll up at least 500 leadoff plate appearances in a season in which his average never made it to the Mendoza Line. (Previous record for lowest full-season average: .211, by Eddie “Sparky” Lake, for the 1947 Tigers.)

But wait. On the other hand, after the Phillies moved Schwarber into that leadoff spot to stay on June 2, they went 65-41 in games in which he led off. Which means they played like a 99-win team when he occupied the top slot in their lineup. So whatever. That worked! Here’s a perfect Strange But True example of how …

He was a leadoff earthquake waiting to happen! For 108 games in 2023, Schwarber was the first Phillies hitter to step into the box. He got a hit to lead off exactly 21 of those games. He hit a single to lead off only six of those games. So you think that was a problem?

Um, not so much. His OPS leading off games still wound up at 1.056. Does that sound good? It should, since it was merely the highest OPS, as the first batter of the game, in the history of a franchise that has been around since 1883 … because, apparently, all those leadoff walks (21) and leadoff Schwarbombs (11) can also be helpful. Which reminds us: If we just talk about his whiffs and his average, we’re leaving out some stuff!

He was also Ruthian! You know what else apparently can be helpful? Piling up massive amounts of homers (47), RBIs (104), runs scored (108) and walks (126). You know who has had that season? Oh, only Babe Ruth (six times), Mark McGwire (twice), Lou Gehrig, Mickey Mantle, Barry Bonds and Aaron Judge (once). And also …

Kyle Schwarber.

Which meant even more all-time Strange But True stuff was possible. Such as …

He was pretty much as productive as a guy who hit .306! Let the record show that, according to Baseball Reference, Schwarber finished with an OPS+ of 122. And how Strange But True is it for a guy who batted .197 to have an OPS that was still 22 percent better than league average? Well, it’s the highest OPS+ in history by a qualifying hitter whose average started with a “1.” So there’s that. But there’s also this:

Bo Bichette in 2023 — .306 AVG, 123 OPS+
Schwarber in 2023 — .197 AVG, 122 OPS+

How can that be possible? Excellent question. I’m not in charge of OPS+ calculations, but I’m guessing it has something to do with this: The guy who hit .197, amazingly, had a higher on-base percentage (.343) than the guy who hit .306 (.339)! That can happen when one guy draws 99 more walks than the other guy. But nevertheless, here come more Schwarbarian shockers. …

He hit .197 … and still led his team in runs scored! Does that seem hard to do? You should answer yes, because here’s the complete list of players since 1900 who have done that, on any team, with an average below .200, over any full season:

Kyle Schwarber, 2023 Phillies
List ends here — but not this list …

He had 100 more whiffs (215) than hits (115) … but still led his team in runs scored! You’ll love the rundown of all the special offensive forces who have ever finished a season with at least 100 more strikeouts than hits:

Adam Dunn (twice) … Joey Gallo (three times) … Chris Davis (2018) … and Schwarber (2023). What. A. Group. But … how many of those legendary whiffers also had 108 runs scored or led their team in runs (or both)? Here’s that complete list:

Kyle Schwarber, 2023 Phillies
List ends here

Stay out of the WAR Zone — Not surprisingly, Schwarber says even his teammates had all kinds of fun messing with him over his wacky stat line.

“There was a time,” he recalled fondly, “at some point this year, that I was a negative WAR player. So we were all laughing about that.”

Hey, his good news was that, by season’s end, he did in fact climb out of that negative-WAR zone. The bad news was, thanks to glovemanship issues that the WAR gods couldn’t ignore, he climbed to a final figure of only 0.6 WAR. Which meant …

Was it really possible for a man to mash 47 homers and surpass 100 RBIs and 100 runs scored, yet still be worth less than one win above replacement? Eh, we guess so. But had it ever appeared possible before? That would be no.

Incredibly, the only previous, similar monster season to lead to a WAR number under 3.0 was produced by another Phillies masher of some renown — Ryan Howard, in 2008. Somehow, the Baseball Reference WAR room looked at that Howard season — which included a staggering 48 homers, 146 RBIs and 105 runs — and calculated that to be worth just 1.8 WAR. Clearly, WAR can be confusing like that sometimes.

So in the end, did Kyle Schwarber care about his average or his whiffs or his WAR? Nope!

“I mean, did I picture myself doing this, hitting what I’m hitting? No,” he said. “I’m the first to tell you it’s all kind of interesting. … But you know what? At the end of the day, for me, if we’re getting a win, I’m happy.”

Our favorite Strange But True Ohtani-isms of 2023

It’s almost a reflex action to start every Strange But True column with the regularly scheduled Shohei Ohtani highlight reel. But since you’ve been treated to, like, 988 other Ohtani stories in the past week and a half, we’ll let him hit second in this lineup.

Oh, and also: We’ve already dug deep into the wildness and weirdness of that $700 million contract … and compared him to Mookie Betts/Gerrit Cole … and reminded you how many consecutive hits he’d have to give up before his career batting average would drop below the average of Unhappy Hitters Who Have to Face Ohtani. So no need to do that again.

Which means we can just use this space to shake our heads again over our favorite Strange But True Ohtani moments from 2023. Ready? So … on with the Shoh.

He never stopped making Tungsten Arm O’Doyle jokes possible — Do we need to re-tell, for the final time, the origin of the hilarious saga of Ohtani/Tungsten Arm O’Doyle? OK, we’ll make it quick. It began two years ago, with this then-innocent tweet.

every time I see an Angels highlight it’s like “Mike Trout hit three homes runs and raised his average to .528 while Shohei Ohtani did something that hasn’t been done since ‘Tungsten Arm’ O’Doyle of the 1921 Akron Groomsmen, as the Tigers defeated the Angels 8-3”

— ℳatt (@matttomic) May 18, 2021

Now, 2 trillion references later, Tungsten Arm O’Doyle can go down as one of the 21st century’s greatest fictitious legends. And Ohtani now can go up the freeway to Chavez Ravine to leave him in the dust. But in 2023, his last season in Orange County, the Angels kept Tungsten Arm on all of our radar screens, with stuff like this:

• Opening day — Ohtani the pitcher: six shutout innings, 10 strikeouts. Ohtani the hitter: reaches base twice. Tungsten Arm subplot: Angels still lose, 2-1, because … Tungsten!

• Aug. 18 — Ohtani the slammer: Hits a single in the first inning and whomps a grand slam an inning after that. Ohtani the teammate: Watches his team turn its first triple play since 1997 to keep this game tied in the ninth. Tungsten Arm subplot: Angels get an Ohtani slam and a game-saving triple play … and still lose to the Rays, 9-6, because … see above.

• Sept. 3 — Ohtani the track star: Steals his 20th base of the season, in what turned out to be the final time he reached base this year. Ohtani the historian: Becomes the first man in National League/American League history to join the 20-Steal/10-Win Club since the unforgettable Adonis Terry did it for the 1890 Brooklyn Bridegrooms. Tungsten Arm subplot: Angels still lose, 10-6, to an Oakland team that was 54 games under .500, because, clearly, this was their final chance to get Tungsten Arm O’Doyle into the fake headlines … so the baseball gods demanded they make it count.

Ohtani, the tri-cyclist — Back on May 9, 1918, someone named Babe Ruth went 5-for-5, with a triple, a single and three doubles, while pitching into extra innings before finally losing to Walter Johnson. The Babe never had another game with a single, double, triple and any pitches thrown. But on April 27, Ohtani had a game like that, in a win over Oakland. Here’s why we mention it:

He was the first pitcher with a single, double and triple in any kind of game in 36 years (since Danny Darwin did it in 1987) — and only the third in the past six decades. You know who didn’t have any games with a single and double and triple this year, despite the fact that they weren’t distracted by having to throw a single pitch? Oh, only Ronald Acuña Jr., Mookie Betts, Julio Rodríguez, Bobby Witt Jr. and about 1,000 other guys who otherwise appear seriously multi-talented.

Ohtani, the box-score filler-upper — Then there was June 27. Ohtani the pitcher: Faces 24 White Sox and strikes out 10 of them. Ohtani the hitter: Takes three swings all night … and gets three hits, two of them homers.

Here, at no extra charge, is your handy-dandy list of dudes in the division-play era with a double-digit strikeout game and a multi-homer eruption in the same game: Rick Wise (1971), Madison Bumgarner (2017), Zack Greinke (2019) and … Ohtani.

Ohtani, the 493-foot delivery man — Then, three days after that two-homer, 10-K game, a man who had a better strikeout ratio than Gerrit Cole this year launched a home run that was projected by Statcast at 493 feet, but actually, according to NASA scientists we just made up, reached Earth’s orbit. Don’t believe us? You can watch it! (And you should.)

Ohtani, the all-time twin-bill king — Finally, what do you say we salute the greatest doubleheader performance in baseball history (as declared by Strange But True World HQ, acclaimed as the ultimate authority on this subject, as of two sentences ago)?

July 27 in Detroit. Ohtani the pitcher: Throws a one-hit shutout in Game 1 of this doubleheader. Ohtani the hitter: Mashes two home runs in Game 2 of this doubleheader.

Question from those of us who write Strange But True Feats of the Year columns: Who the heck does this? Who the heck has ever done this?

The answer, according to the Elias Sports Bureau (via MLB.com’s resident Ohtani historian, Sarah Langs): That would be nobody, of course. How many men have ever thrown any kind of shutout in one game of a doubleheader and hit even one homer in the other game of a doubleheader? One man — named Shohei.

But a one-hit shutout in Game 1 and two home runs in Game 2? That’s not something you would expect to see in the major leagues. That’s out of the Marvel Superhero League.

Special bonus note from Langs: The last human before Ohtani who twirled a shutout in one game of a doubleheader and then started at any other position in the other game? George H. (Bambino) Ruth, on July 17, 1918. But no home runs for the Bambino that day!

Christmas special Strange But True Ohtani video treat — What can’t Shohei Ohtani do? If you watch this video, it’ll be obvious that the answer is: Not a freaking thing.

Nice Catch Sho! ✅
Shohei Ohtani catches his own helmet while at bat in Anaheim. Atta Boy! 🤩#大谷翔平 #Ohtani #Angels #GoHalos pic.twitter.com/5m2Hy0lDvG

— Anaheim Sports (@AnaheimSports1) May 7, 2023

Our 10 favorite Strange But True Hitting Feats of 2023

WITHOUT A TRAYCE — Just as we all expected, the first three-homer game of 2023 didn’t come rocketing off the bat of Aaron Judge or Matt Olson. Instead, it was the work of the Dodgers’ Trayce Thompson, a man whose brother (Klay) is slightly more famous for his 3-pointers than he is.

Nevertheless, in his first start of the season, on April 1, Trayce became the first Dodger in history to stuff a grand slam, three-run homer and solo homer into the same box score … and then … to make sure columns like this remain in business … that same guy went 40 days between hits (April 19 to May 30) … batted .148 over the rest of the season … and hit as many big-league home runs over the next six months as he hit that one day … because baseball!

THEIR SECOND FIRST ACT — In an April 13 visit to Yankee Stadium, the Twins just might have fired off the Strangest But Truest back-to-back homers ever. You know what their Nos. 1-2 hitters, Edouard Julien and Carlos Correa, did that day? They went back-to-back in the first inning. But that’s not the Strange But True part … because that has happened before.

You know what had never happened before? That would be a team’s 1-2 hitters going back-to-back in the first inning … but not to lead off the game. Turns out it’s helpful to feats like this if their teammates work a convenient little nine-run first-inning bat-around into their busy schedule. Whaddaya know.

FEEL THE PINCH — In baseball, as in life, it’s never just about how it starts. It’s about what happens when you enter the game. For more proof of that profound, age-old saying, which the great philosophers have been sharing since, oh, about half a paragraph ago, you should look at the 2023 stories of Elias Díaz and Andrew Knizner.

• Elias Díaz is a catcher for the Rockies. He turned 33 years old last month. And since the rules required somebody on the Rockies to be an All-Star, that somebody was him.

Remember his huge All-Star moment? How ’bout a game-winning, lead-flipping pinch home run to hand the NL the All-Star game. Awesome. But here comes the Strange But True part:

Pinch-hit All-Star home runs — one … in one swing.

Pinch-hit regular-season home runs … in 15 pro seasons, nine big-league seasons and 2,166 trips to the plate — zero!

Timing truly is everything.

• Andrew Knizner has spent most of his five-year big-league career as Yadi Molina’s backup catcher in St. Louis. But on May 17, quite the Strange But True plot line busted out. One minute, he was pinch running for Paul Goldschmidt (look it up!) in the eighth inning of a 9-1 game. Next minute, the Cardinals were batting around … and then this happened.

What you just saw was A Man With No Position smoking a grand slam. And only two other players in the past 65 seasons have done that. One was Rajai Davis in 2008. The other (Gene Stephens) did it in 1959 after pinch running for Ted Williams. But that isn’t even the Strange But True part.

The Strange But True part was that Andrew Knizner, a man who has never hit a slam while actually playing a position, hit this slam off Mike Brosseau, who doesn’t normally give those up because he’s an infielder. Which means … a guy with no position pounded a grand slam off a position player. And if you’re not more grateful than ever now for these Strange But True Feats of the Year columns, I don’t know how you made it this far into this one.

PLEASE IGNORE THE VIDEO EVIDENCE — A classic Strange But True thing happened to Padres shortstop Xander Bogaerts on May 3: His career-high 30-game on-base streak was broken despite the weird technicality that he was standing on first base when it ended.

Geez, it sure wasn’t his fault. He hit what looked like a single to right field. It wasn’t caught in the air by an outfielder, just like most hits. But unfortunately for him, the most confused man in San Diego happened to be his teammate Juan Soto. … Who missed the part where the baseball bounced … and hustled back to first base … where he found Bogaerts wasn’t as happy as usual to see him.

And that’s how a man who was standing on a base saw his on-base streak disappear, right before his eyes. However many times Bogaerts wondered in 2023 why he ever left Boston, we’re guessing that was one of them!

NICKEL BACKS — Is Five Hit Fever something a guy could catch just hanging around the batting cage? We ask because Marlins hit machine Luis Arraez definitely caught it this June. How Strange But True is this:

Arraez in June: three five-hit games in 16 days.

Miguel Cabrera in his 21-year career: two five-hit games in 2,797 games.

Strange but 100 percent true.

But we also asked about Five Hit Fever because of …

The Angels: They mysteriously went five years — despite employing Mike Trout and Ohtani for all five of them — without having any stinking hitter on the roster figure out how to get five hits in a game … until Hunter Renfroe finally unfurled their first quintuple since 2018 in a June 24 blowout of the Rockies. How even? But wait, Here comes the …

Strange But True Epilogue: So how long after that would it take for an Angel — any Angel — to deliver their next five-hit game? It was quite the wait … of two batters … until Mickey Moniak got his fifth hit of the day in that same inning. Because … Five Hit Fever! Catch it.

THE WILD BLUE YAN-DER — If you’re familiar with the work of Cubs catcher Yan Gomes, you’re probably aware he’ll never be confused with Usain Bolt, let alone Dee Strange-Gordon. But in the Strange But True world we live in, anything is possible, even for a man who ranked 449th in the majors this year in average “sprint” speed.

So naturally, on July 20, at age 36, Gomes did something no catcher his age (or older) had done in the past 95 years: He hit two triples in one game! But that’s not all, because he actually hit triples in two plate appearances in a row. Now here are two reasons we might be interested in something like that:

1) How many other catchers hit two triples in a game not just this year, but the year before that … and the year before that … and the year before that? Anybody out there guess none? Excellent guess!

2) How many triples has Gomes hit on any of the 201 other days he has been allowed to play baseball by the Cubs over these past two seasons? That, too, would be none … in 708 trips to the plate.

But in the middle of all that, this same guy smacked a triple in two at-bats in a row? C’mon. How can you not love the total random wackiness of …

Baseball!

IT’S ALL CYCLICAL — We could have worked the Reds’ human tool kit, Elly De La Cruz, into this column about 12 different ways. Did you know he hit a baseball this year harder (119.2 mph) than any ball hit by Aaron Judge? That seems like a cool thing to do for the fastest dude on the field.

But that’s not even what De La Cruz is doing in this sentence you’re currently reading. Nope. How about this:

On June 23, he hit for the cycle — in the 15th game of his career.

On July 8, he stole for the cycle — by stealing second, third and home in the same inning.

And even though stealing for the cycle is a thing we just invented, it’s still a thing you need to be in awe of, if only because he also stole third and home on the same pitch.

3D tracking — Elly De La Cruz steals third and home on the same pitch

Elly strobed every 1 second starting with the pitcher’s first move pic.twitter.com/bjbmgjnk5H

— David Adler (@_dadler) July 9, 2023

Last Red to steal for the cycle — Greasy Neale, in 1919!

Last Red to hit for the cycle — Eric Davis, in 1989, which meant all the other teams had fit 110 cycles in between Reds’ cycles!

Players in the live-ball era to do both 15 days apart (or quicker) — Elly De La Cruz … and that’ll do it for that list.

Other players in the past 98 seasons who did both in the same year — Exactly one, and it was … um … Wil Myers? He did it in 2017. But that, in this case, is not the Strange But True part.

Because you know what else happened the day De La Cruz hit for the cycle and started all this? The Reds released a guy named … Wil Myers!

VLAD YOU STOPPED BY — Don’t ask us how Vlad Guerrero Jr. didn’t make this column just for fielding a groundball in May, getting the baseball stuck in the webbing and then flipping the whole glove to the pitcher for an out that proved, once again, your glove will not let you down. Except that wasn’t even his Strangest But Truest feat of that week.

Just your ordinary, super casual 3-1 groundout 😅 pic.twitter.com/ZVeDIMwBb6

— Toronto Blue Jays (@BlueJays) June 1, 2023

For his greatest Strange But True classic, we take you to May 23 in Tampa Bay, when one of the goofiest games of the season busted out … in large part thanks to Vlad.

Ever heard of a team scoring nine runs in one inning — all against position players masquerading as pitchers? That. Really. Happened. In the ninth inning of that game. For the first time in the history of this sport.

And the “pitcher” who was responsible for most of that carnage was Rays first baseman Luke Raley. But in the midst of all those rockets Raley was serving up, he at least shared this nutty little moment with the fearsome Vlad Guerrero Jr., right after taking the mound in the eighth.

Luke Raley strikes out Vlad Guerrero Jr.! pic.twitter.com/d856XYH5tW

— Bally Sports Sun: Rays (@BallyRays) May 24, 2023

So Vladdy could have made the Strange But True Feats of the Year just for that, except … have we mentioned there was a nine-run ninth inning in this game? … So what were the odds of the Jays’ lineup turning and turning and turning … until here came Vlad to bat again in the ninth inning … only to find Raley still pitching, with the bases loaded? Want to guess what happened in the rematch? Yeah, it did.

Does it get much Stranger But Truer than a guy striking out and mashing a slam in the same game against the same position player? That would be hard seeing how it had never, ever happened … until Guerrero showed up at home plate.

SUSPENDED ANIMATION — What’s even stranger (but truer) than a Mookie Betts 5-for-5 game? How about a suspended Mookie Betts 5-for-5 game!

That’s a thing that happened during the Dodgers’ August visit to Cleveland. And here’s the part that propelled it into this column:

Aug. 23 — Mookie goes 2-for-2 (with two singles) before half a billion raindrops cause a slight intermission in his hot streak.

Aug. 24 — Mookie gets three more hits (single, single, double) after the game finally resumes.

All right, now here’s what makes that a Strange But True all-timer: For the rest of time, history will try to convince us that Mookie had a five-hit game on Wednesday the 23rd … even though many human witnesses exist who could tell you that three of those hits actually met the bat on the “wrong” day (Thursday the 24th).

So how Strange But True was that? So strange that, according to our friends from STATS Perform, only one other player since 1901 has ever gotten five hits or more in a suspended game … with more than half of them coming on the “wrong” day. But the other (Tom Paciorek) did it in a 26-inning game (on May 8-9, 1984). Which would be 17 more innings than it took Mookie Betts — our official Strange But True Time Traveler of 2023.

WE’VE GOT YOUR NUMBER — The Braves’ whole season could have made this list, because in case you missed it, they somehow had a higher slugging percentage as a team (.501) than bashers like Bryce Harper (.499), Rafael Devers (.500) and José Ramírez (.478) had by themselves. But instead, we’re going to zone in on Aug. 12, our favorite Braves Strange But True day of the year.

They scored 21 runs in Game 1 of a doubleheader against the Mets that day. But that wasn’t the Strange But True part. The Strange But True part was how they divvied up those 21 runs. By which we mean they had …

One guy with one RBI (Ronald Acuña Jr.).

Another with two RBIs (Sean Murphy).

Another with three RBIs (Austin Riley).

Another with four RBIs (Matt Olson).

Another with five RBIs (Nicky Lopez).

And yet another with six RBIs (Ozzie Albies).

Which meant everyone else who played had no RBIs. And that caused way too many of you to say to yourselves: Hmmm, could that ever have happened? And also: You know who we should ask? The Strange But True column!

So we reached out to the great Katie Sharp of Baseball Reference to look into that very question. On one hand, she did find one team that ran off that 1-2-3-4-5-6 RBI box-score trick. On the other hand, that team was Kiki Cuyler’s 1925 Pirates (against St. Louis on June 22, 1925). Which means it happened as recently as 98 years ago.

But wait. That team actually had two players with two RBIs and two players with one RBI. So you know what that means? It means that, since RBIs became an official stat in 1920, this Braves game was the first time in history that six hitters on one team went 1-2-3-4-5-6 in the RBI column … while nobody else on their team was driving in any runs. And that, for all of you who played 1-2-3-4-5-6 in the Powerball that night, is why we love …

Baseball!

Our 10 favorite Strange But True Pitching Feats of 2023

FOUNTAINS OF WAINO — We’ll miss Adam Wainwright. This is, after all, a column dedicated to mixing fun with all the beauties of baseball. And we can’t think of any player, over the past two decades, who got that concept any better than the Cardinals’ curveball king.

So what was more perfectly Strange But True than the 200th and final win of Wainwright’s wonderful career? Here’s what made it the kind of game Strange But True Feats of the Year columns latch onto:

• He spun seven shutout innings — for his only scoreless start of the year.

• He won this game, 1-0 — for his first 1-0 win in nine years.

• His catcher, Willson Contreras, hit a home run to drive in the only run — the first time he’d ever done that as a Cardinal. But now let’s keep going, because we’ve barely scratched the surface of the Strange But Trueness.

• Back on Opening Day of the 2014 season, Wainwright won the 100th game of his career. He went seven shutout innings in that game, too. But hold on. There’s more.

• How do you think the only run scored in that 100th win? Would you believe on a home run by his catcher, Yadi Molina? Yep, the same way he won No. 200.

• But wait. There’s still more. How many other pitchers in history have ever won their 200th game 1-0 on a home run by their catcher? Right. That would be none.

• And how many other 1-0 games in Wainwright’s career did he win on any kind of RBI by his catcher? Right. That would also be none.

Baseball. It’s the best.

NUMBER SCRUNCHING — In baseball, we love big numbers. But here at Strange But True World HQ, we also love little numbers. The littler the better, in fact. So here’s a toast to these tiny numbers from 2023.

1 — Does it seem impossible for a pitcher to record a one-pitch strikeout? Ha. Are you familiar with the weirdness of baseball? All it took for Phillies reliever Jeff Hoffman to pull that off, back on July 28, was about three trillion raindrops in Pittsburgh. Then he marched in after a rain delay, inherited a 1-2 count on Jared Triolo, got him to swing through a slider and voila!

We have a one-pitch strikeout in Pittsburgh for Jeff Hoffman, thanks to all those raindrops! pic.twitter.com/VdSspudMmm

— Jayson Stark (@jaysonst) July 29, 2023

3 — Do first innings get any neater or cleaner than the three pitches it took Giants starter Anthony DeSclafani to zip through his first inning on May 28 against the Pirates? Wait. Don’t answer that too swiftly.

Three pitches. Three outs. But also … one extra-base hit (by Tucupita Marcano, on the first pitch of the game). Luckily, the next two pitches went: Line-drive out … fly-ball double play. The most baseball thing ever.

0 — Finally, hard as we’ve been trying not to pick on the Mets in this column, it doesn’t get much Stranger Than Truer than a walk-off balk, issued by a pitcher (Josh Walker) who threw zero pitches. But that was the Mets season in glorious micro-Met-rocosm.

Here’s that deal. Walker rolls in to relieve Grant Hartwig in an Aug. 1 tilt with the Royals. Tie game. Two outs in the 10th. Leans in for the sign. His PitchCom glitches out. And … oh no!

The umps called a balk to score the walkoff run in extras despite the Mets arguing that they were having pitch on issues pic.twitter.com/mJvCHmrIjp

— Talkin’ Baseball (@TalkinBaseball_) August 2, 2023

We’ve been keeping track of pitch counts for the past 36 seasons. In the 80,000 games or so in those 36 seasons, only one other pitcher has ever managed a no-pitch “balk-off” to end any game: Mike Stanton, for the Nationals, on July 15, 2005. But whatever it took in 2023, it felt as though the Mets were gonna find a way to Met!

CRAZY EIGHTS — Who had a Stranger But Truer 2023 than Lucas Giolito? It was wacky enough that he ping-ponged from the White Sox to the Angels to the Guardians in a mere 36 days. But that wasn’t even the Strange But True part.

The Strange But True part was he found a way to allow at least eight runs in a game for all three of those teams. The “good news” for Giolito: He was not the only guy ever to do that for three different teams. But the bad news was, the last pitcher to do it was Bill McGee … in 1899!

DOMINGO’S PERFECT STORM — If baseball made any sense, all perfect games would be thrown by true aces. So if Gerrit Cole, Justin Verlander or Clayton Kershaw are ever in the mood to go 27-up, 27-down some day, we’re cool with that. We’d even sign off on occasional guest perfectos by Corbin Burnes and Max Scherzer — because at least we could understand how that’s possible.

Instead, we are continually reminded that baseball makes no sense. And could there be any more proof than this: The only perfect game of the past decade was authored this season by world-famous non-ace Domingo Germán of the Yankees. And can we all agree that’s just ridiculous?

Six days before Germán’s perfecto (June 22 versus Seattle) — He faces 23 hitters, gives up 10 runs, gets only 10 outs and never even retires three in a row! (The attractive box-score line: 3 1/3 IP — 8 H, 10 R, 8 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, 4 HR, 93 pitches to get 10 outs!)

Six days later (June 28 at Oakland) — The same human faces 27 hitters, gets all 27 of them out! (The much more presentable line: 9-0-0-0-0-9, 97 pitches to get 27 outs!)

We were so befuddled by this, how could we not ask our friends from STATS if it was as illogical and unprecedented as we suspected? The answer: Well, you could probably guess the answer.

This was baseball’s 20th perfect game since 1909. There was one slight difference between German’s gem and the other 19: He was the only one who faced at least 23 hitters in the previous start and never once retired three in a row … because of course he was!

THE LORENZEN EXPRESS — At least Domingo Germán didn’t throw any other no-hitters this year … but Michael Lorenzen did … because why the heck not! He was traded by the Tigers to the Phillies on Aug. 1. He no-hit the Nationals eight days later.

No need to mention that after the no-hitter, his ERA over the final two months was 8.01. Doesn’t matter. He no-hit his way right into the Strange But True Feats of the Year column. Here’s why:

Steve Carlton — spent 15 years pitching for the Phillies, won four Cy Young awards, led all left-handers in baseball in WAR over those 15 seasons, made the Hall of Fame … and pitched zero no-hitters.

Michael Lorenzen — had spent eight days as a Phillie, had never thrown a pitch for the Phillies in Philadelphia before that night, was out of the rotation five weeks later … but has achieved trivia immortality as the answer to a version of this question: Who’s the only Phillie to pitch a no-hitter in Philadelphia since Roy Halladay?

Wow. Baseball. Is it amazing, or what?

DREAM WEAVER — You should know that Luke Weaver did not throw any no-hitters for the Reds this year (or for his other two teams — the Mariners and Yankees — either). But he, too, did exemplary work in proving our recurring thesis about baseball: It. Makes. No. Sense.

On one hand … From May 31 to July 8, Weaver made eight starts for the Reds. You decide how that went.

• His ERA: 8.66

• Slash line of hitters he faced: .342/.392/.613

• What that means: He basically turned the entire league into 2012 Miguel Cabrera (who hit .330/.393/.606 that year).

So that was a disaster, huh? Um, don’t answer yet, because …

On the other hand … how’d the Reds make out in those eight starts? Would you believe …

They went 8-0!

You’d think we were making that up, right? And then you’d remember … this is the Strange But True Feats of the Year column!

BOX-SCORE CORNER — You don’t need us to point out that certain trips to the mound are Strange But True material. You just need to consult the box scores. They tell you all you need to know about games like this …

Ben Lively, Aug. 1 at Wrigley — In the Cubs’ 20-9 thrashing of the Reds, Lively was more like Ben Deadly:

4 IP, 13 H, 13 R, 13 ER, 2 BB, 2 K, 4 HR, 1 HBP, 94 pitches to get 12 outs!

So what’s up with that? You know how hard it is to give up 13 hits and 13 earned runs but not even get 12 outs? Nobody had done that since Les (not a McDonald’s entrée) McCrabb … on April 16, 1942! … But you know how much harder it is to give up 13 earned runs and four homers? So hard that, since earned runs became an official stat more than a century ago, just one pitcher has done that. His name: Ben Lively.

Luis Cessa, April 16 versus the Phillies — We’re not sure how this column turned into a Reds Rotation’s Greatest Hits collection. But it wouldn’t have been possible to compile these Strange But True Pitching Feats of the year without this sparkling start by Cessa:

3 IP, 14 H, 11 R, 11 ER, 3 BB, 0 K, 1 HR, 1 HBP, 1 WP, 88 pitches to get nine outs.

So what’s up with that? Before we could even look this up, loyal reader Allan Wood beat us to it. You know how many pitchers since 1900 have given up that many runs and that many hits but not even gotten 10 outs? Just one. Right … Luis Cessa.

Josh Fleming, May 28 versus the Dodgers — Meanwhile, in non-Reds box-score developments, Fleming’s final start of the year for the Rays was a classic in more ways than one:

6 IP, 12 H, 10 R, 8 ER, 2 BB, 3 K … and 5 HR!

So what’s up with that? Ha. Trick question. You won’t believe it. Yes, this man gave up 12 hits, 10 runs and five looonnnggg balls — but it was all worth it. Not just because he saved the bullpen, but also because … his team won (11-10)! He’s the first pitcher to get bruised for that many runs, hits and homers in a game his team won since the legendary Dodger, Ralph Branca, was allowed to stick around for all nine innings in a scenic 17-10 game in Pittsburgh on June 25, 1949.

CUT TO THE CHASE — Every trip to the mound at Coors Field is an opportunity, all right — an opportunity to wind up in the Strange But True Feats of the Year column. So congratulations to Chase Anderson, for doing his part in a messy little 25-1 loss to the Angels on June 24.

Here is how he kicked off a fun little 13-run third inning that day:

First pitch — Mike Trout home run.

Second pitch — Brandon Drury home run.

Third pitch — Matt Thaiss home run.

That’s three pitches, three home runs. And you don’t see that much. In fact, home runs on three pitches in a row, at any point in any inning, is a thing that’s happened only one other time to any active pitcher … and it was the same pitcher.

No kidding. Back on Sept. 17, 2020, when Anderson was a Blue Jay, he served up three in a row to the Yankees in the fourth inning. And that would make no sense at all, except it’s …

Baseball!

NO-HIT PANDA-MONIUM — We don’t ordinarily take these Strange But True expeditions into the wilds of the minor leagues. But we’re making an exception here for the beloved Rocket City Trash Pandas, of the always-entertaining Double-A Southern League, because …

The good news: On April 9, the Trash Pandas did one of those things that are supposed to feel like a dream come true — by throwing a no-hitter, in an all-time minor-league classic, against Chattanooga. But now comes …

The not quite as good as that news: They managed to throw that no-hitter and lose, which doesn’t happen much, even in the Southern League. And that isn’t even the Strange But True part, because you should definitely read on to …

The not even as good as that last thing news: They pulled off the rarified feat of throwing a no-hitter … and allowing seven runs … but also … allowing all seven of those runs in the same inning.

How Strange But True is it to give up seven runs in a no-hitter? Oh, you know. No big-league team has ever done it. And the only other time it’s known to have happened in the minor leagues was Aug. 31, 1948, in the late, great Pony League, when Louis Blackmore of the Wellsville Red Sox did it in a game in which there wasn’t much need for anybody to get a hit … since he also sprinkled in 17 walks that day!

So is that how the Trash Pandas did it? Eh, not exactly. Their attractive seven-run inning … in the middle of a no-hitter, remember … went like this:

Walk … walk … infield-fly rule popup (one out) … walk … strikeout (two outs) … walk (one run) … three-run error on the center fielder (four runs – oops!) … new pitcher … hit-by-pitch … hit-by-pitch … hit-by-pitch (five runs) … walk (six runs) … run-scoring wild pitch (seven runs) … hit-by-pitch … strikeout (three outs).

So what are the odds of giving up seven runs in a no-hitter, no matter how many innings it takes? This took some math. But here goes …

In the last 105 big-league games in which a team gave up no hits, you know how many runs those 105 teams gave up? That would be six — in all 105 of those games combined! But somehow, the Trash Pandas gave up seven … in one inning. And if you’ve never seen anything like that, we can help with that too!

90 seconds of how to NO HIT a team…but give up 7 RUNS and lose. 😳 pic.twitter.com/aClXzUfyJS

— Rob Friedman (@PitchingNinja) April 9, 2023

THE GHOST OF HARVEY HADDIX — But the Milwaukee Brewers don’t need to check in with any Trash Pandas to know that throwing a no-hitter can be overrated. They lived it Sept. 10 — in one of the Strangest But Truest games of any year.

For nine innings that day, Corbin Burnes and Devin Williams no-hit the Yankees in the Bronx. Then reliever Abner Uribe stomped out of the bullpen and made it 10 hitless innings. If the Brewers had just remembered to score a run or 12 in those 10 innings, they’d have had a way better time.

Instead, this game kept going — through the 11th inning, through the 12th inning, into the 13th inning — during which … the Yankees went from getting no hits in any inning to getting at least one hit … and scoring … in every inning, from the 11th through the 13th, because … it’s baseball … and … it makes no sense.

So on a day when the Brewers gave up no hits for 10 innings, they still lost, 4-3. And how Strange But True was that? You’ve come to the right place.

On one hand … teams that spin off nine hitless innings tend to win a lot. In the division-play era (1969-2023), 150 teams have pitched exactly nine innings of hit-free, run-free domination in either a regular-season or postseason game. The record of those teams is a perfect 150-0. OK, sure.

Or 10 is also cool … because no team in the modern era has pitched exactly 10 hitless, scoreless innings in a game and lost, either. The record of teams that do that: 4-0 … as we’d all expect. However …

On the other hand … here comes the Strangest But Truest no-hitter fact ever: No team has ever taken a no-hitter into the 11th inning … and won that game! This is true. Those teams are now 0-4. Really.

So if your favorite team ever finds itself throwing a no-hitter in the 11th inning, don’t say we didn’t warn you. It may seem like a beautiful thing while you’re watching it. But in reality, it’s more dangerous than you think, just because it’s …

Baseball!

(Top photo of Kyle Schwarber: Rich Graessle / Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)